Both men and women can be victims of emotional abuse. This type of abuse is the most pervasive because it leaves no marks, no bruises, no evidence, no trace of anything.
Except.....the words repeat over and over in your head. That's where the bruises are, where the marks are made, where the evidence is.
Many abusers apologize for those hurtful words, thinking that makes it "okay." And friends, and family may not believe you, if the abuser only says those things when no one else is around, and acts so wonderful when someone else is present.
But, don't let anyone convince you otherwise - those hurtful words are abuse, and when repeated, do far more damage than a punch or a slap or a kick. And, abusers don't realize those words said to Mom or Dad hurt the child as well. And, in essence, they are teaching the child that abuse is okay. And, the victims, allowing that abuse to continue, are also teaching children that abuse is okay, and teaching the children not to speak out against abuse.
Abuse, whether in the forms of words, or physical action, is NEVER okay. Just because the person didn't try to kill you doesn't mean it's okay that the person SAID they were going to kill you. It is NOT okay that a person said s/he was going to kill you in front of your children. Those children heard those words. Those children were terrified that someone they love, a parent, just said s/he was going to kill the other parent. That is ABUSE. And it is NOT okay.
Remember the old saying: sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?" I think it should say, "sticks and stones may break my bones but words will ALWAYS hurt me."
Here's an post from about.com that talks about how emotional abuse is NOT okay. Click here to read more.
Call today to find out how the Gosteli Law Firm can help if you are in an abusive relationship.
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